This is Why Nobody Likes You
Um….not being a smug, self-satisfied prick like it’s my job?
Reflections on a Carnival of Human Misery
There is a show on the Oxygen network called Bad Girls Club and it is, doubtless, the most depraved, abasing, desolate sixty minutes of television I have ever witnessed. My roommate promised “girls who get drunk and fight”. ”Okay,” I thought, expecting some drunken sorority hi-jinks. Instead I watched in horror as eight girls sporting skintight denim, plunging spandex...
Marcel 'n' Me!
I have always cherished the belief that I would be an amazing celebrity interview, were I in any way inclined for celebrity. The Proust Questionnaire in Vanity Fair is, thusly, my white whale. So, due to an absence of requests from the Editorial Department, I have chosen this blog as the forum to expose my innermost-est thoughts and reveal the inner workings of my...
A couple of weeks ago in therapy (and thus began the second most annoying sentence ever typed! (The first was some weeks ago when I texted my friend “I found a candle that makes my room smell just like The Ritz Paris!”)) I mentioned to Jane (not her real name but she bears a striking resemblance to Jane Krakowski so, there you are.) that I couldn’t really do much writing in my...
I really like this girl.
This is something that I own now
It is an alarm clock and it was a freebie from the good people at JimmyDean sausages. For some reason Alexa didn’t want it. I don’t get it. Sausage alarm clock! Sorry, suckers.
We all watched Mad Men last night, of course because we care about it even when we don’t and even when it’s boring it might be about to not be boring and we don’t want to miss that so we watch it, and all that’s well and good and fine and such. However, can we wrap this aging-nontraditiona-hippie-Long-Beach woman’s shit up? Like I think there should be a split...
Things I Am Fearful of at 1:45 AM In Order of...
1. Interminable state of moderate poverty 2. Murder (my own or anyone elses) 3. Bugs crawling on me.
A little concerned
that a lovely friend who, with her rosy creamy skin, silky blond hair and bright blue eyes reminds of a milkmaid, may be offended or horrified or both or something, when a mutual friend told her the same.
Today was like really blerrrrrrrrrrr r r r r r r rrrrrrrrrrrrrrwhatamidoing?